I know I have not been great about posting updates here or even on social media, I think I got busy living life a little. While I am not quite back to my #livelife status of travel, social engagements, dinners out with friends, wine tasting, yachting (a girl can dream) I did actually return to the office on March 14th. This felt like a gift! I was a kid on her first day of school (assuming you loved school), getting ready every morning, picking outfits out the night before (in my head), it was so exciting and a yes, a little stressful. While I was so happy to see people in 3D after almost two years of only seeing most through a square Zoom window, they were potential germ carriers. My immune system is so young and immature right now (yes, a little like me...lol) and I felt like I had to wear this invisible 6 foot protective armor keeping my distance from everyone. When I would let my guard down, I would have a scare like someone I had just seen, texting me to tell me they tested positive for COVID. In early May, COVID decided to play house in any "body" (a lot of people) in my building who hadn't had the joys of COVID over the past two years. This sent me back into a mini retreat of work from home status. When I asked my oncologist for a note to return to work in March, he said I was his only patient asking to go BACK to the office - and so in May when I said I needed a new note to work from home again, he gladly wrote it. Luckily, for my sanity, that did not last long and within 10 days, I was back in the office, dodging hugs and handshakes of colleagues who had not seen me in a long time. What weird times.
So what is different on Day 300?
I have not had an infusion, transfusion, steroid, or chemo cocktail in 300 days, so1. My body is stronger
2. My hair is growing
3. My brain is clear
I am grateful everyday even though
5. I still have to wear a mask inside with pretty much anyone or anywhere
6. I still worry that cancer will come back (out of my control, I know)
7. I still have the extra weight but as I say "my body is a wonderland" so I am trying to be kind to it
What is worth celebrating?
8. ALL OF IT!
9. Life!
10. My health
11. Being cancer free
12. Have had 2 rounds of childhood vaccines
13. 65 more days until my Re-Birthday - August 23, 2022 😉
There is a transition period that you go through from surviving/fighting mode to living again - it is strange and hard to explain but definitely a phase of this entire process. I am happy to say, I am more on the living side of things now, letting go of that fight mentality. Excited and scared about the future, mostly because I have no idea what that looks like, but I know adventure awaits for sure!
So raise a glass with me today, and let's toast!
Here's to 300 days and #livinglife #fuckcancer #onlywayoutisthrough #warrior #grateful
